Sometimes I still wonder, have I made the wrong decision?
Almost everyday since I chose my course, I ask myself the same damned questions over and over again without getting any answers for it.
What am I doing in Accounting?
Am I supposed to be doing Accounting?
Why did I choose this again?
Why do I feel so...empty sometimes?
Since when did I lose my motivation in my studies?
Why am I on the verge of failing for my papers?
Will I be happy being an accountant in the future?
If not Accounting, what else should I be doing then?
Why am I asking myself all these questions?
Will there ever be a correct decision?
Like this, over and over again, these questions float around in my head all the time, clouding my senses, disturbing my emotions.
There's a line I read in a book today:
"...But more often than not, the easy decisions are the wrong decisions..."
Is this a sign?
Can God just please come right out and TELL ME WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE?
Can I get this privilege of knowing a sliver of my future from God?
Because I really, really NEED it.
These days I even lost my appetite to eat.
I'm putting food into my mouth just so I wouldn't get sick and worry my parents.
What the hell is this?
How come it seems like I'm the only one who's facing this problem??
What's wrong with me?
I really envy those who have a clear vision of what they want to do for their future.
No matter how tough life goes for them, they can overcome it because it's their passion and interest in life.
I have no idea that I'll come to this stage in my life. I never foresee this situation at all.
I wish that someone can tell me what should I do. I wish that someone who had been in this situation before can come out and tell me that it's OK, and tell me the right thing to do. I wish that someone can just give me some directions, guide or whatsoever.
If my life is a movie, I think the audience must be having a hearty laugh right now.
If I am someone else watching myself now, I must be laughing like hell and thinking how screwed up this girl is, 18, dreamless, direction-less, wandering, wasting time, stupid.
Sorry for having you guys listening to this, I know this isn't nice and pretty, I know it must be very vexing to read these kinda stuff, but if you did finish reading this I'm very grateful to you for hearing me out. I feel too suffocated and I need to let this out.
Should I take a turn in my life?
Yvonne..
Almost everyday since I chose my course, I ask myself the same damned questions over and over again without getting any answers for it.
What am I doing in Accounting?
Am I supposed to be doing Accounting?
Why did I choose this again?
Why do I feel so...empty sometimes?
Since when did I lose my motivation in my studies?
Why am I on the verge of failing for my papers?
Will I be happy being an accountant in the future?
If not Accounting, what else should I be doing then?
Why am I asking myself all these questions?
Will there ever be a correct decision?
Like this, over and over again, these questions float around in my head all the time, clouding my senses, disturbing my emotions.
There's a line I read in a book today:
"...But more often than not, the easy decisions are the wrong decisions..."
Is this a sign?
Can God just please come right out and TELL ME WHAT SHOULD I DO WITH MY LIFE?
Can I get this privilege of knowing a sliver of my future from God?
Because I really, really NEED it.
These days I even lost my appetite to eat.
I'm putting food into my mouth just so I wouldn't get sick and worry my parents.
What the hell is this?
How come it seems like I'm the only one who's facing this problem??
What's wrong with me?
I really envy those who have a clear vision of what they want to do for their future.
No matter how tough life goes for them, they can overcome it because it's their passion and interest in life.
I have no idea that I'll come to this stage in my life. I never foresee this situation at all.
I wish that someone can tell me what should I do. I wish that someone who had been in this situation before can come out and tell me that it's OK, and tell me the right thing to do. I wish that someone can just give me some directions, guide or whatsoever.
If my life is a movie, I think the audience must be having a hearty laugh right now.
If I am someone else watching myself now, I must be laughing like hell and thinking how screwed up this girl is, 18, dreamless, direction-less, wandering, wasting time, stupid.
Sorry for having you guys listening to this, I know this isn't nice and pretty, I know it must be very vexing to read these kinda stuff, but if you did finish reading this I'm very grateful to you for hearing me out. I feel too suffocated and I need to let this out.
Should I take a turn in my life?
Yvonne..
2 comments:
全然解ります! (zen zen wakarimasu)
I've been asking this to myself just an hour + ago.
Feel kinda awkward that my friends seems to have made their decisions and path for the future. It's like I'm still standing just a lil further than the starting point, looking at a split road. (wow, I can describe lol)
Hope that we both can find the right and suitable path. *prays hard*
xoxo
-Amber
At least you're slightly better than me since you're in a course you wanted to be in already...haihz...yeah...I'm really praying hard now..thanks..
Yvonne..
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